What would you say?

In my 10th grade English class, a large part of the curriculum that year was focused on poetry. I think there was an unusual amount of poetically talented individuals in that particular class because the following year, Mrs. Crooks admitted to my mom (who worked at the school and was quite chummy with some of the teachers) that she was less than excited about the poetic prowess of the class who followed us.

In one of the poetry exercises, we had to randomly exchange our work with a classmate for critiquing. I received mine back with the words “you use unnecessary words that you don’t need” scribbled in the margin.

Which brings me to this question: why would you even say “to say the least?”

“Estella has man troubles to say the least.”

Well, to say the least, wouldn’t you just say “Estella has man troubles?”

“To say the least” is four extra syllables you just wasted your breath on. I mean, think of all the wonderful things you could have said instead.

“Helllloooo, Kitty!” (not even four syllables, but much better anyway, a bargain sentence, if you will)

“I love you, man.”

“Let’s get pizza.”

“Wanna make out?”

The possibilities are endless (Steven). (Not that I was talking to Steven, it’s a natural reflex, like saying “pig” after “it’s possible” [see Princess Bride]. I can’t *not* say it.)

For some of you, that last sentence will make no sense whatsoever.

So, if you had four extra syllables to use today, what would you say?

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Published in: on August 6, 2007 at 10:10 am  Comments (5)  

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5 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Ha ha. It just hit me that “Helllloooo, Kitty!” is exactly four syllables. These early mornings kill me.

  2. Well for starters, I hope you sent that note back to your critic, crossing out “that you don’t need” to highlight his/her use of unnecessary words as well.

    And I hope I wasn’t the critic who wrote that!

    Just because you have me in a Princess Bride state of mind, I think my four extra syllables right now would be “As you wish…” with the “wish” drawn out into two syllables as I tumble down a hillside.

  3. Of course it wasn’t you. It was Tabby Massengill (which is funny because the only OTHER memory I have of her is walking behind her down in the hall one day as she discussed personal matters of an intimate nature). I didn’t point out her awesome example of redundancy to her, but I showed Mrs. C and we had a good chuckle.

  4. Was she saying, “Sometimes I just don’t feel fresh…even after a shower!”

  5. how about:

    huh? Who farted?


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